Tuesday 22 July 2014

POEM CLUB #6: 'Brown Leather Gloves' by Oliver Comins

Oliver Comins
Last week we had a great response to Liz Berry's poem from The Emma Press Anthology of Motherhood, so this week we're going to look at a poem from The Emma Press Anthology of Fatherhood, which we published in May. It's a fantastic collection of poems about becoming a father and the experience of fatherhood, but the major concern of the book turned out to be the poets' fathers. Many of the poems deal with generational differences and difficulties of communication, and the poem I've chosen for this week's Poem Club is one of the more positive ones: still heartbreaking, but in an uplifting way.

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Brown Leather Gloves


These are my Father’s gloves
with which I am wrestling
as I walk down to the station
on another crisp morning
of frosted cars in a frozen suburb.

Who's holding whose hands now?
Inside the fingers there's
more of him than there is of me –
all those years of rubbed skin and sweat.

Leather gives a better grip,
doesn’t really overcome the cold.
But it’s better than nothing,
this thin layer of brown
which keeps the weather off.

On the platform
I remove one Father,
reach out to greet a friend.
My other Father holds me steady.

— by Oliver Comins, from The Emma Press Anthology of Fatherhood
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Emma's thoughts. It was impossible for me not to reflect on the broad differences between the Motherhood anthology and the Fatherhood anthology, not least because lots of people asked me about it. The answer I usually gave was that the Motherhood book was full of raw and often disturbing emotions, while the Fatherhood book felt muted in comparison, with more poems about unspoken, unacknowledged feelings. 'Brown Leather Gloves' feels like a good example of this, because I find it deeply moving, but I also feel that the pain and love caused by the implicit distance and miscommunication are all buried beneath several layers of reservation and stiff upper lip.

Your thoughts. We had a great set of responses to this poem, and several people felt a strong connection to that last stanza in particular. The combination of deep emotion and those tactile details about the gloves seemed to resonate especially with Anonymous and JHumble, who shared their own memories of items of clothing. Phyllis Klein loved the relatable yearning of the poem, asking 'How often do we want a piece of clothing to keep the memory of a parent with us?' She added, 'Then there is the fact that leather gives a good grip but doesn't overcome the cold and how this line opens into a deeper part of the poet's relationship with his father. I can imagine the father gripping the son's hand without tenderness or emotional warmth.'

Joseph Coelho and Emily Tealady were both struck by the second line of the poem, drawing out the meaning. Joseph Coelho commented, 'I found the idea of 'wrestling' very interesting to me', explaining that 'it suggested the struggle we all have of those that have passed between the real person and the idealised (or not so) memory.' Emily Tealady had a similar thought but took it in a different direction: 'The initial lines make me think of images of boxing gloves and of wrestling – those disagreements and fallouts we have with our parents as we grow up.'

We had some quite lengthy comments this week, so I do recommend you scroll down a bit and read them in full, as they are fascinating. And now, I'm delighted to announce that the winner of this week's Poem Club is... Phyllis Klein! 

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The Emma Press Anthology of Fatherhood
What do you think of 'Brown Leather Gloves'? Do you find it moving? Do you recognise this kind of relationship? What do you think the poem says about modern parenthood? This Poem Club is closed, but you can still share your thoughts in the comments section below. Don't be afraid of sounding stupid! Just let us know what you like about the poem or what it makes you feel. All comments will be held for moderation, so don't worry if it doesn't appear immediately after you send it.

<-- POEM CLUB #5: 'The Steps' by Liz Berry'
--> POEM CLUB #7: 'Raspberries' by Andrew Wynn Owen

5 comments:

  1. Phyllis Klein24/07/2014, 18:07

    I love this poem and it does move me. I like the maleness of it, which I don't think of as "stiff upper lip" but nuanced and layered. First is the implication that the father is dead and how it is cold which brings sadness and grief into the poem. How often do we want a piece of clothing to keep the memory of a parent with us? I also love the way the author talks about the skin and sweat of his father's hands inside the gloves as the presence of his father, and how the one glove holds him steady at the end. Then there is the fact that leather gives a good grip but doesn't overcome the cold and how this line opens into a deeper part of the poet's relationship with his father. I can imagine the father gripping the son's hand without tenderness or emotional warmth. And how universal this father and son kind of connection seems to me. It's as if by wearing the gloves, the son can get closer to the father, as the gloves become two fathers and the son tries to find what he can to heal their relationship. In so few words this poem says so much.

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  2. I found this poem beautifully raw. I found the idea of 'wrestling' very interesting to me it suggested the struggle we all have of those that have passed between the real person and the idealised (or not so) memory. This is then revisted at the end when the gloves become two fathers, one that is removed (the real father, the father that has passed) and one that is kept (the chosen memory) and yet both gloves contain the skin and sweat of the father the "real" essence of him which throws up a third 'father' one that just 'is', one that is not a product of ideas and memories, one that is simply his mark left in the world. I feel that is is that mysterious, unjudged third father that exists in the material of the gloves that is the true source of comfort, something solid and tangible.

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  3. This poem brings a lump to my throat. as I once had to get off the train at on the way to work as a man standing next to me wore a tweed jacket, like the one my dad used to wear and I could smell the tweediness of it. I loved the part about removing one "father" but the held him steadily. It is this solidness and reliability of a father that I identified with most.

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  4. After my Dad died, I was given the thinsulate hat he'd worn to keep his head warm in the last few months of his life. Inside were a few strands of white hair, which he'd lost due to the chemotherapy. I was pleased to have this hat, but sad when the last of these white hairs disappeared ... lovely poem :)

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  5. I really like the simplicity of this poem. The initial lines make me think of images of boxing gloves and of wrestling - those disagreements and fallouts we have with our parents as we grow up. '(These are my Father’s gloves
    with which I am wrestling') it also makes me think of wrestling with emotions, with feelings.
    I like the idea that he is carrying his father with him, that his father is within these gloves (all those years of rubbed skin and sweat) and that in a way, these gloves are protecting him, as a father would 'leather gives a better grip' and also makes me think of helping hands, and a father being there for you. i love the line 'my father holds me steady' - how something like this item, this pair of gloves, can make you feel close to someone you miss. I really like this poem and how having something fathomable, something real to hold, can provide you with comfort - I know I have items like this which I treasure. It is like the person lives on through the inanimate object.

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